How to Be Happy
Consistently. And there’s a framework for it.
To be clear, right out the gate, I don’t mean “being happy all the time”. There’s a time and place for everything and I’m pretty sure “happiness” falls under “everything”. What I’m talking about is being truly happy, consistently.
Be careful. Don’t confuse that with mood. You might wake up early in the morning to your flat mate or significant other chirping away about how beautiful the sun looks and you may feel like throwing them into the washing machine with the rest of the week’s laundry — and that’s fine. That doesn’t dock any points off your happiness.
You can be annoyed in the moment yet happy with life at the same time.
So how do we make sure that we’re happy, both short-term and long-term, while enjoying the journey that is every day living?
At Masterlife, we believe that “true happiness” is not just a state of mind — it’s a life skill. And so, like any other skill, it can be acquired and developed over a reasonable period of time.
To that effect, Masterlife Founder Anirudh Narayan has a framework for consistent happiness of his very own and he encapsulates it beautifully. I’ve shared a video below for reference.
The pursuit of happiness is a common endeavour shared by millions the world over. And for each one of us, it is a very personal journey.
So, let’s get into some of the main daily habits and mindsets we need to matter-of-factly function with to make sure that no matter what life throws our way, we catch it, handle it — and look cool the whole time.
#1: WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT, THOUGH?
We tend to tie our goals to objects. We decide that we’ll be truly happy when we own a house, or buy that dream car, or get a boyfriend, or get married, or get that 7-figure salary. That’s okay. Makes sense, even.
But what’s of critical importance is recognizing the “real” goal hidden underneath that object. If your goal is to get married and you make it happen — there’s no guarantee you’ll be happy if the underlying “want” — like a soul-mate with common interests — wasn’t acquired as well.
Do you want to get married? Or are you deathly afraid of loneliness? Did you know that there are people in fully functional marriages that also suffer from loneliness? Really.
How about this: You want a job that pays really well. Perks, bonuses, travel, the whole deal. There are two job opportunities in front of you. You pick the one with the highest package. The work culture might be overly-competitive but you stick with it because money! Right? That’s what you WANTED — right? Cut to three years later and you have stomach ulcers and migraines that just won’t quit. But you’ve got the best company health insurance. That makes it all worth it — right? Wrong.
Guess what? Maybe you’re the kind of person that thrives in a more open culture which allows space for creativity and making mistakes. Maybe it doesn’t pay all that well but you would see more career growth because you’d be crushing it on the daily.
If you’d asked yourself the right questions three years ago — you wouldn’t be suffering in a hospital bed today, surrounded by impersonal flowers sent over by the company HR, fearing dismissal because you’re not fit to give your 100% anymore thanks to burnout.
Bottom line: figure out what your wants and needs really are. It’s okay — be shameless about it.
Admit to yourself the truth of what you’re gunning for and maybe then you can discard all the unnecessary frills and be more streamlined in your go-getting process.
If you’re clear about who you are and what you want — you will be happy every step of the way towards your goals because you’ll be in a space that fits you and vice-versa.
#2: HEALTH IS WEALTH: CLICHÉ BUT TRUE
If you’re a regular reader of the Masterlife blogs, you’ll know that my relationship with health has been pretty rubbish over the last decade. It took a global pandemic and forced national lock-down for me to look inward and figure out what my body needed. (A break-up with milk, as it turned out).
It wasn’t easy and it didn’t happen overnight (lifelong habits can be clingy, as a matter of fact) but desperation to survive the year 2020 helped keep me on track.
Yoga, more water, vegetables, vitamins, minerals — these have turned not just my health around but my overall personality. Check out our blog on Increasing Energy Levels for a more detailed account of the same.
It’s ridiculous that the concept “Health is Wealth” was discussed since elementary school but took me living my best life at 30 to truly understand it.
You may be named Employee of the Decade, get a massive salary hike, be gifted an all-expense paid trip to the South of France (post vaccination) — all in the same day — and you simply CANNOT feel elation if you’ve had a migraine for the last three days and your stomach is still struggling to digest yesterday’s lunch. Right? Right.
So, here’s what you do to increase your health and improve your energy levels:
- Read my blog on Increasing Energy Levels. Lol. But do read it.
- Drink at least 3 litres of water every day.
- Green leafy vegetables. Stat.
- Almonds, Cashews, Super-Fruits. The time is now.
- Exercise — 40 minutes minimum.
- Sleep properly. Listen to your body. YOU decide your sleep cycles.
Hundreds of studies have found that people who are more physically active have more pleasant-activated feelings than people who are less active. Moreover, people have more pleasant-activated feelings on days when they are more physically active than usual.
I know it’s hard but stop procrastinating exercise. Get your butt out of that chair and get moving.
If you need help getting started on a new schedule that’ll cover everything you need — you can always sign up for our Master the Best You program.
We’ve helped hundreds of people by assigning a personal habit coach who took them through a set schedule with goals and trackers and made sure they improve tremendously in 5 areas of their lives: Diet, Sleep, Health & Fitness, Mental Health, and Productivity.
#3: NOVELTY THAT DOESN’T WEAR OFF
Our subconscious is happiest when we are learning new things and picking up new skills. When you consistently have new challenges to take on, and the environment is an encouraging one, you will be surprised to notice that new challenges start equating to happiness.
It’s not just long-term relationships that need spicing up, it applies to your daily routines as well.
Looking more scientifically at novelty and the brain, there’s also a significant connection showing how our happiness increases when faced with little time and a steep learning curve.
So, keep learning new skills, developing more adeptness (it could be as simple as learning to use chopsticks) and enjoy the flow of happy endorphins.
#4: DISENGAGEMENT IS A POWER-UP
“The richest, happiest, and most productive lives are characterized not just by the ability to fully engage in the challenge at hand, but also to disengage periodically and seek renewal”–Loehr and Schwarz, The Power of Full Engagement
What does this mean? It means that our brains, just like our bodies, need to detox from time to time.
Give yourself the time and space to disengage from the pressing matters at hand — because life will go on and matters needing attention will always exist for as long as you do.
Queen Elsa was right. Sometime, just Let It Go.
There are many different ways to do this. Meditation is the most popular but you can also set aside some time for just you, a mug of coffee, and some journal writing. Or go for a walk. Take a route that is pre-decided or tread-on often. Since the route is already decided and is the same every time, you will simply walk and do nothing else. This prompts reflection and relaxation.
By the time you get back home, you will feel calm and relaxed and can therefore go straight to bed and fall asleep sooner than if you’d been engaged in work and had closed your laptop only a few minutes prior.
Try this daily for a week. And just like Dumbledore’s Phoenix, you will be born anew and completely ready to be awesome, all over again.
#5: GIVING UNTO OTHERS IS THERAPEUTIC
For centuries, the greatest thinkers have suggested the same thing: Happiness is found in helping others.
A really famous Chinese saying goes: “If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.”
Scientific studies now provide compelling data to support the anecdotal evidence that giving is a powerful pathway to personal growth and lasting happiness. We now know that giving activates the same parts of the brain that are stimulated by food and sex. Interesting.
Helping others may just be the secret to living a life that is not only happier but also healthier, wealthier, more productive, and meaningful.
Of course, the act of giving may not always be pleasurable. It may make us feel depleted or even taken advantage of. So, here’s the main things to remember while giving — not until it hurts — but until it feels great:
- Choose Right: It’s not about how much you give but how much love you put into the giving. Find what causes you’re passionate about. Give accordingly.
- Your Time is Just as Precious: The gift of your time could be more valuable to your friends and family than materialistic things that cost money. Spend your time. Wisely. Altruistically.
- Your Skills Are Invaluable: Find ways to integrate your skills and talents with the needs of others. Maybe you’re skilled at music. Help some kids in your building get selected for the school choir.
- Don’t Get Tied Up in Guilt: Give however much you can, when you actually want to. Don’t let anyone guilt-trip you into giving. If that is the case, you will not remain committed to it for long, thereby defeating the whole purpose.
Remember: giving, like yawning, is contagious. It promotes cooperation and social connection. So, start that ripple effect and experience your own happiness multiplying!
Happiness is a personal thing.
So, it is imperative that we try and ignore social conditioning, dig really deep, and figure out what makes US happy.
Once we figure ourselves out, there’s really no limit to what we can achieve or how happy those achievements can make us. Let’s fill that cup of joy, shall we?
For learning new skills, understanding yourself better, and picking your own mind, remember — Masterlife is just a click away.
Cheers!
